Boy are his arms tired!

Alan Watts, a British businessman has traded his multitude of frequent-flier miles for a trip to the moon. Ok, not really, but he will venture 75 miles (120 kilometers) above Earth.

Watts accrued 2 million flyer miles and is cashing them all in to travel on the world's first commercial tourism flight to space, Virgin Atlantic Airways spokeswoman Katie Francis said.

He will be among the first 1,000 people to travel on a space tourism program in 2009 with Virgin Galactic, an offshoot of British entrepreneur Richard Branson's Virgin Atlantic. Flights cost $200,000.

Watts is the managing director of an electrical engineering firm and has taken more than 30 Virgin Atlantic flights in each of the last six years.

"The nearest I've come to space before was going on the Space Mountain ride in Florida," Watts said in a statement, referring to an attraction at Florida's Disney World. For 200Gs, Watts could've cashed in, gone to Orlando approximately 232.55 times to ride Space Mountain approximately 111,624 times! What a rube!

Test flights are planned for early next year.

The businessman will have three days of training before boarding the spacecraft, which travels at more than 3,000 miles per hour (4,800 kilometers per hour). Training largely consists of eating a full meal and then riding a gravitron until nature takes its course.

Once passing the testing with flying technicolors, he and five other crew members will be able to float in zero gravity and see the curvature of the planet, Francis said.

"When we first contacted Alan to let him know he had qualified for this unique offer, I think he thought it was a prank call," Branson said in a statement. "I suppose I shouldn't have stated my name to be I.P. Freely and asked if his refrigerator was running," continued Branson.

"Personally I am delighted that we have made it possible for Alan to do something that previously he had never dreamed was possible for him." Watts' next goal? Becoming the first comember of the 75 mile high club.

Neo-Nerdites

Most nerds flock to technology like ants to a picnic. We drool over gadgets like the latest iPod iteration (rumors abound of a 1 gig hearing aid model due out in spring 2007, the iPod WHAT?). We dream about Blackberries, RAZR phones and all that is cool, lightweight and technologically hip.

But some, because of a love for Mother Earth or a propensity of holes in their wallet, must turn away from all this. We long for the sound of MP3 tunes in our ears, but make do with a trusty (and cheap) Walkman. We stay organized with free bank calendars and an endless stream of Post-It notes instead of a single Palm Pilot. That is, until now.

The Pocket Mod is part calendar, part notebook and consists of a carefully folded single sheet of paper. Simply click the items you want (lined note paper, calendars, games, even a Morse code guide) and drag them onto the paper. Print it, fold it, and take it with you. It's quick, cheap, lightweight, never needs charging and any sensitive info can be destroyed with a match. Try that with your Pilot.

Battle of the Super Nerds!

You know it would come down to this. The world's foremost (and richest) computer geek, William Henry Gates III (Bill to his friends, ult1m4t3 h4ck3r d00d to his online pals) was going to have his comeuppance. But who could be crass enough, geeky enough to even attempt to put the beat down on the Nerd of Nerds?

Yes, none other than Napoleon Dynamite. Fresh from training with his cage fighter brother, Kip, Napoleon has traveled to Gates' home turf of Redmond, Washington to do battle.

Will the billionaire philanthropist keep his title? Or will the tot-eating whirlwind from the west topple the Master of Microsoft?

Freak of the Geeks! Not on pay-per-view but right here!

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for... Vikings?

Hello again! I'm back from the windy city and not a moment too soon.

Yesterday, former Hollwood stuntman, Robert McDonald and a crew of 20 embarked on a voyage to follow the path of Vikings from the days of yore. Except, Old McDonald and his pals decided that any schlub could traverse the seas in an ordinary viking ship so they made theres out of popsicle sticks! For real!


15,000,000 popsicle sticks, 348 trips to the dentist and more glue than ralph wiggum has ated in the last 15 years! For more info, check out Mr. McDonald's website here: http://www.obvikingship.com/index3.htm

I wonder if they're prepared for 21 viking funerals?

Non-Naked Nerds

We here at NBN apologize to our readers for the delay in any recent posts (Editor: do we even have readers?). Two thirds of the staff have gone on vacation, leaving little ol' me to find the articles, conduct the interviews, set the type for the copy presses, and hand deliver each and every copy of this to the world. It ain't easy I tells ya...

Let's say you have a nerd that's been hanging around lately (every neighborhood has a few). You don't mind the free software upgrades to your computer or the long nights playing World of Warcraft. You can even handle the lengthy discussions on how to construct a working phaser using stolen government technology. Even so, there's a certain... aura around your new found couchmate. Living on cheese puffs and Mountain Dew has given his shirt the ability to stand on it's own. He could use a cleaning, but how do you keep him from exposing his nerdiness to the neighbors? Why, with Nerdy Shirts of course! Although a small company, they do produce some fine tees. Some you will get immediately, others (like this one) may require explanation from a higher nerd power. There are even cutout glasses to mind meld with your latest cellar dweller. Now if you could only get him a date...

So nerdy, it’s almost cool.

In 2000, in a quest to make an ever smaller computer, a company called VIA mounted all of the necessary hardware (processors, video/audio card, etc.) onto a motherboard roughly seven inches square. Clip on a hard drive, a few bytes of memory and a power supply and you’ve got a fully functioning computer. What this mini mother lacks in speed and processing power it makes up for in size. Think of it: a computer case the size of a cigar humidor. This got some nerds thinking.

Why not make the computer case from a cigar humidor?

Some case designs have gone far beyond that (and I use the term “case” very loosely). Outdated hardware, gaming platforms, briefcases, even an E.T. doll have been tricked out like so many late model Hondas. Some get done on the cheap (for example, a Windows XP program box) while others have spent a lot of time and money (I’d love a Bender robot at my desk, but can’t imagine the cost to build it).

The site includes detailed descriptions of the projects along with numerous photos for each. Just in case you had a yen for turning an antique toaster into an MP3/DVD player.

Lego, my Lord!

Ok, you may have seen those lego stories of the bible or lego lord of the rings and while they are impressive, i don't think they hold a candle to this church of lego. This website is full of pictures a f.a.q. and comes complete with a dedication sermon. I wonder how many times the pulpit had to be rebuilt due to late night trips to the bathroom? And I don't believe some of the congregation are appropriately dressed? I look to you woman in the green corset, man in jedi robes, those hungover or asleep in sunglasses. Anyway, go forth and let your plastic soul be transformed!